Busted Most Elegantly

I have a very lovely friend who just happens to a) have a sharp eye for editing, and b) be a master of English grammar. Oh, and c) be incredibly witty.

After reading my post from yesterday about Busch Gardens, she wrote to me. She wanted to point out a minor slip in grammar she found, twice, in the post.

I found it pretty damn funny (and, alas, spot-on). So funny that it would be a crime not to share it with others.


I'm sorry that you are distressed with regard to Busch Gardens. It is Sean's favorite park as well. We discovered that February is a great month to go there. Pick a Monday, and you will be certain to avoid all field trips and most tourists. It was dead there, and Sean got to re-ride almost every coaster without any waiting time.

Now I must confess to my own source of distress. My most articulate and well-written friend-- you--has fallen prey to the misuse of the world only. Examples from your recent blog:

"Busch family only has one seat on the board" and "like only purchasing fish"

Sigh. Has the Busch family had their fortune reduced to owning only a seat on the board? Have they lost their homes, cans of peas, and their personal underwear? Is everything lost? And, are they truly purchasing only fish for their parks? Have they stopped contributing to their employees benefit plans? Must visitors bring their own toilet paper? Is the park being run on generators powered by windmills and serviced by kind volunteers? I am now more distressed than you with regard to the misfortune of the Busch family. How sad for them -- much less for thirsty park-goers! Please keep me abreast of the status of the poor Busch family. I think I might just send them a can of peas and a roll of toilet paper.

Sigh.

We do what we can...

(I adore you. I simply could not resist pointing out your continued, yet unfortunate, misplacement of the word only. If you weren't so brilliant, I would not bother. Feel free to amuse yourself at my expense as well. I love you!)